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My mom is 65 and we've been having the same exact type of argument over and over and over.
She'll ask me something and then she'll get completely furious with me when I say I don't know.
For example, a few weeks ago we were driving through the Central Valley and she asked me what a pile of stuff in the middle of the field was for. I said I didn't know and she started to describe this pile to me and I was like "I didn't see it and I don't know what it was for." Then she got angry with me and said I was being disrespectful.
The next day her cell phone rang and she asked me how to answer it. I said I had no idea how to answer her phone, and she started screaming at me that I was a little bitch.
Like three days ago she asked me "Who wrote the poem "Will you be my pas el queue?" (sp????) I said I had no idea and she was like "Well it was OBVIOUSLY a joke" and rolled her eyes and I was like "Well I didn't get it at all." Then I asked her who did write it and she couldn't remember at all where it came from or what year it was from, so I was like "How do you expect me to know it then?" and she screamed at me that it was impossible to have a conversation with me.
In every instance, she doesn't know something, so she asks me and she gets pissed at me when I don't know either.
This is a recent thing and I don't get where it's coming from at all.
AnotherMcIntosh
(11,064 posts)Duer 157099
(17,742 posts)(runs to kitchen to find the cinnamon)
Do you have a ref for this?
AnotherMcIntosh
(11,064 posts)Loss of Smell Linked to Alzheimer's Disease
http://www.creators.com/health/rallie-mcallister-your-health/loss-of-smell-linked-to-alzheimer-s-disease.html
rocktivity
(44,580 posts)several times in the same conversation.
rocktivity
pipi_k
(21,020 posts)before she became bedridden we would take her places with us, and it didn't matter how often we took a certain road (there's only one road out of here, BTW) she would always say, "Wow...we've never been this way before!"
Also, she would tell us in the morning that she had attended a football game the night before.
And she started hiding her used Depends in various places in her bedroom, then swear that someone else had done it.
It got real weird here.
Duer 157099
(17,742 posts)Personality changes like you describe are indeed an early symptom. Early detection is getting better every day. Good luck.
pipi_k
(21,020 posts)that one important sign was not knowing what a common item is used for.
For example, someone might not remember the word "fork", and that's not too scary, but to totally forget (or not know) what to do with the fork would be scary.
But what you describe...ooooh...that's scary too.
Alzheimers? Dementia?
I'm so sorry...it doesn't sound good
PS...I saw similar behavior from my MIL (93) in the months before she died (from causes unrelated to Dementia, etc.)
Brigid
(17,621 posts)She's showing early signs of something.
Suich
(10,642 posts)Google: small vessel ischemic changes
Definitely get her to a doctor.
Good luck!
struggle4progress
(118,379 posts)Avalux
(35,015 posts)Is she taking meds? Best course of action is to write down all of these little incidences then go see her doc and discuss.
XemaSab
(60,212 posts)for leg pain.
Avalux
(35,015 posts)I can't give you advice here, but it's certainly possible it can be causing her symptoms. Yep - go talk to the doc.
Ron Obvious
(6,261 posts)When you've lost your keys there's nothing to worry about. It happens to all of us.
When you no longer recall what keys are for, that's when you're in trouble.
This may sound a bit flip, but I'm speaking from personal experience (my father).
mysuzuki2
(3,521 posts)Repeating yourself frequently is one sign.
vanlassie
(5,692 posts)Wait Wut
(8,492 posts)Good luck. We had to trick my mother into seeing one. She was furious.
My mother and I never liked each other much, but the most painful conversation with her started when she said, "I'm scared. I keep forgetting things."
"We all do, ma. Don't worry."
"No. This is different. I'm forgetting who I am."
We all knew what was happening. We were trying to protect her. That was the first time in my life I felt any sort of compassion for my mother. I became incredibly protective of her after that.
It could be something else. But, prepare yourself. It's a painful disease for the family. My mom, on the other hand, rediscovered her love of crayons.
My sincere hope for you and your family that this is something simple. If it is Alzheimers, my love to you all.
Myrina
(12,296 posts).... it was just after her own father had died (of old age) and none of us kids really knew what their relationship was like so at first we thought she was just processing or grieving ... but then the behavior got more odd ... she would get in the car to go to the grocery & come home 5 hours later from 'a drive in the country' ... she bought the same birthday gifts for the grandkids several times over, for the same year .... and would sit in a chair and stare out the living room window, humming, for hours on end.
At one point she went to bed with a 'headache' and after dad couldn't get her out of bed after 2 DAYS, we took her to the ER. The Dr. asked her how many kids she has, she said 5 (there are 7 of us). Who was president? She said Eisenhower (it was 1986).
Turned out she had a Glioblastoma Multiformae - aggressive and incurable. She had surgery 3 days later and was 'almost herself' again for about 4 months, then it came back. She died 3 months later.
Oddly enough, her mom (my grandma) died of the same thing back in the 50's when they didn't have half a clue about brain cancers. And one of her female cousins (on her maternal side) also died of a Glio while my mom was going thru her ordeal. So I have that going for me.
Downwinder
(12,869 posts)Get a professional opinion.
Jenoch
(7,720 posts)you should get your mother to see a doctor. These sorts of personality changes are not always because of Alzheimers.
My mother had dementia in her later years, starting at about age 75. Her mother also had dementia but her brother died at 87 without ever having those kinds of symptoms until about a year before he died. I will say this about my mother's dementia, she never got belligerent but she did say a lot of funny things. I was driving her to a doctor's appointment and she said "I see an airplane." I asked her where, so I could see it too, and she replied, "In the sky, doofus."
sarge43
(28,946 posts)If you can arrange it, a geriatrics specialist
hunter
(38,337 posts)I hope it's something not so bad.
But if it is bad, like my grandma's insanity and dementia, you have to let it roll off of you, even laugh, no matter how bad it is. My mom, and a few relatives, were seeing my grandma as a sane woman for far too long, and they were hurt, over and over and over again.
I'm not sure how it happened but my siblings and I understood grandma was crazy. When grandma was nice we remembered that, but when she was awful it was no big deal, even when her evil cat decided to attack. I've got scars from her cat, but I was impervious to anything she said on bad days.
My wife has equally awful stories. One of her aunts recently passed away, she suffered Alzheimer's and put her family, especially her husband, through hell. She accused him of having affairs with the caretakers he hired, selling her property, rearranging the furniture, etc., etc., etc..
It's really hard but some people just get mean when their minds begin to fail. It's a random bad thing, "shit falling out of the sky" in our family vernacular.
handmade34
(22,758 posts)and that you are the subject of her symptoms... my dad is beginning to have these behaviors... he is in Florida and I will be going down to help take care of him soon... He becomes confused easily and repeatedly asks the same question...
I bought a small trailer in his MHP and I spent a week fixing it up... went and bought laminate flooring to install and the next day he came over 3-4 times asking why I wasn't done yet and he keeps telling everyone that I helped him build a cottage we had (I was only 4 or 5 at the time) But, there are things he is very coherent about
interesting article... about dementia/alzheimers
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/alzheimers-disease-and-dementia/AZ00053
LiberalEsto
(22,845 posts)She had always been as sharp as a tack and hilariously sarcastic. Lifelong Democrat, former Democratic committeewoman for her precinct in lower Manhattan.
We were at a family reunion weekend years ago, and for some unknown reason she decided that the book I was carrying was stolen from her. She got very angry and argumentative about it. It was so uncharacteristic of her that it made me wonder what was wrong with her.
Then family members noticed other little incidents and began worrying about her. Eventually she was taken to a doctor and diagnosed as probably having Alzheimers. She continued to deteriorate until her death 10 years ago.
I think the anger you're seeing is the result of confusion and frustration that things don't seem normal to her. But this could also be a side effect of medication, a mini-stroke, or other factors. I think she does need a complete medical exam and medication review.
ConcernedCanuk
(13,509 posts).
.
.
I forget . .
CC
russspeakeasy
(6,539 posts)And it progressed to kitchen utensils, books she couldn't understand and how to dress herself. She got so frustrated with herself, "I'm so stupid"; that kind of thing. It sent her into a clinical depression. This happened at age 67. She died at 80. She had 13 miserable years of frustration and paranoia.
I never heard her swear until she was about 70; then, wow, who is this woman ?
We took her to two Doctors, they gave her some memory tests and she passed.
We knew she wasn't right, but on the days of the appointments, she did OK.
The caretakers life is a real bitch..money, time, emotional . Unless you have dealt with it directly, it's hard to imagine how draining it can be.
I wish you the best of luck.
Duer 157099
(17,742 posts)...
The patient closed his or her eyes and mouth and blocked one nostril. The clinician opened the peanut butter container and held the ruler next to the open nostril while the patient breathed normally. The clinician then moved the peanut butter up the ruler one centimeter at a time during the patients exhale until the person could detect an odor.
....
Patients in the early stages of Alzheimers disease had a dramatic difference in detecting odor between the left and right nostrilthe left nostril was impaired and did not detect the smell until it was an average of 10 centimeters closer to the nose than the right nostril had made the detection in patients with Alzheimers disease.
http://www.jns-journal.com/article/S0022-510X%2813%2900311-0/abstract
intaglio
(8,170 posts)Jennifer Stamps, a graduate student in the McKnight Brain Institute Center for Smell and Taste and the University of Florida, came up with the idea of using peanut butter to test for smell sensitivity when she was working with Kenneth Heilman, a professor of neurology at the University of Florida.
The ability to smell is associated with the first cranial nerve and is often one of the first things affected in cognitive decline. Because peanut butter is a pure odorant, it is only detected by the olfactory nerve and is easy to access.
u4ic
(17,101 posts)As are mood swings. Apart from the obvious memory issues, a few more are balance issues, incontinence and circadian issues (up all night, sleep during the day). Mixing up memories is another, especially shorter term ones. Long term memory can be unaffected in the early (as well as mid) stages.
Obviously it's best to rule out other issues, such as med reactions, incorrect or outdated glasses prescriptions\cataracts, UTIs etc with the examples I've given.
My father has mixed dementia , a combination of Alzheimers and vascular dememtia from small strokes. He is already at a fairly advanced stage. He can still remember his kids and some things from his childhood, but gets confused very easily with things he used to deal with regularly (money, TV etc) and downright disoriented in places he used to go everyday.
Auggie
(31,207 posts)Happened with my mother-in-law last year. Have her checked.
libodem
(19,288 posts)And get a diagnoses. Then they can start the Aricept as soon as possible. I think it slows the progress and holds them in check longer if you start sooner than later, with the medication.
You are right to suspect her symptoms She is trying to preserve her sense of dignity by blaming you for what she can't think of. It's sad.
pscot
(21,024 posts)by what's happening to her. Try not to over react. You can get help with this. Good luck.
marzipanni
(6,011 posts)"Sorry, I don't know, mom" vs. "How do you expect me to know?"
It would be kind to tell her you mentioned the poem she asked you about and someone told you what it is- "My POSSLQ" Person of Opposite Sex Sharing Living Quarters) that struggle4progress put a link for in reply#9. She remembered thinking that it was funny, and wanted to enjoy it again with you.
I'm sure your mom doesn't like having these lapses of memory, and gets angry because she doesn't want to feel vague.