My sister and her husband did a rush hush job of bullying my parents into moving to NC with them and selling their home. Now that my parents are down there, my sister is so harsh with my mother (when she is not ignoring her), that my mother calls her other daughters in tears most every day. Today, three times. My sister, we have discovered, has been nursing old wounds she perceived (and quite wrongly) as a child 50 years ago ... for half a century ... and now she is showing us a very spiteful, ugly, vengeance filled side we had no idea existed. For most of the last 40 years, she's not been around much, nor spoke to much on the phone. Because of her hijinks, me and my other two siblings are spending most of most days in misery and trying to figure out what to do. Mom and Dad are miserable, and in Mom's condition, that is actually deadly. And the sister being so cruel ... SHE sure as heck isn't happy, either.

I'm going to have to take a train for nine hours and have a family meeting with her and her husband really soon and get this all out in the open face-to-face. The snarkiness and back-stabbing and ugliness has to go.

That is a really tough situation.
I wish you all the best.

It sure does suck. I have a situation that has come to a head about five times now and each time it does I think it is finally finally over, but like the mafia, they pull me back in.

Peace

Family may act like the mafia at times, but there are many ways to avoid their influence. Putting them on total ignore helps immensely.

Most of my family are absolute gems but mummy dearest, brother, sister-in-law and sister are, well, let's just say that sometimes the only thing you have in common with some family members are DNA. I don't have to be in their lives and they don't have to be in mine. Life is much more pleasant that way. Besides, I paid my dues for 30 years. I'm done!

I'm seeing that play out in my life as well.

It never seems to end......

I am within tasting distance of being forever and totally done with a very specific subset of impossible DNA-sharers. At this point, I am so hurt and frustrated and disgusted with those specific people that if some disaster befell them, I would be delighted. I hate that I feel that way about anyone, but I've got nothing left but contempt.

(These are not people I've ever loved, but the family members I do have affection for did once, and I hate watching them be hurt by these molecule thieves.)