12 Best Jokes About The New George W. Bush Elementary School (Video)

12 Best Jokes About The New George W. Bush Elementary School (Video)

Pretty much every president, former or current, is subject to having civic landmarks such as libraries and schools named after him. But it’s a bit ironic that George W. Bush is about to have a namesake elementary school. Maybe it’s because some of his Bushisms have to do with children learning, or maybe it’s because he was a C student who didn’t come across as very bright during his 8 year reign of terror as president, or perhaps it’s because one of the most prominent memories we have of Bush is when he read, “The Pet Goat” to children in a Florida elementary school as he learned that 9-11 was happening.

In any case, George W. Bush Elementary School will be open in time for the 2016-2017 school year near the town of St. Paul, Texas, a growing exurb northeast of Dallas. In honor of the occasion, here are 12 of the best jokes we either found on the internet or came up with on our own…

1. The school motto will be “is our children learning?”

2. The school dictionaries will contain the word “nucular”.

3. Bush will enroll at the school to finish his education.

4. At the dedication ceremony, Bush will read, “The Pet Goat.”

5. Dick Cheney to be hired as an armed security guard for the school.

6. Mike Brown will be in charge of the school’s emergency preparedness plan.

7. Donald Rumsfeld will declare that the missing Iraq WMD’s are buried under the school gymnasium.

8. The Bush quote, “You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test,” will be displayed in the school hallways.

9. The Bush quote, “I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family,” will be displayed in the school cafeteria.

10. The school will officially be called “The George W. Bush For Learnin’ Yer Kids Stuff Place”.

11. The graduation ceremony of the school will prominently display a “Mission Accomplished” banner.

12. Halliburton will provide all school meals and supply the textbooks for the school – at a steep cost to taxpayers, of course.

As a bonus, watch the top “Bushisms” below.