Sorry? My post isn't allowed?

Can't he get hospice at home?

I'm so sorry...

and a nursing home won't take him since he is "imminent".

No, they are kind to keep him, wonderful facility, but even the docs are amazed how long he lingers.

I went through this with a friend of mine and it took a week because he was still phsical strong but he was dying of brain cancer.

They gave my friend lots of morphine.

I went through this with my father-in-law last year.

I'll keep you in my thoughts.

For the future you should think about a polst for your family members...

http://www.polst.org/

Dad is 92...

Bottom line, when you hit this age and have prostate and bone cancer, Stop Walking and Working Out... Your heart will be strong as an ox, and you will die slowly.

We went through similar with my Dad August 2013. Dad was 90, had a catastrophic event that left him brain damaged and unaware. We put him in hospice thinking it would only be a day or two. He lasted a week. He'd always thought his heart would take him out - both his parents died of heart related problems. He heart was what kept him going.

No matter what your choices, it's heard. I'll be sending good thoughts your way.

Your words certainly struck a familiar chord. You're undoubtedly exhausted, physically and emotionally. I know the similar situations I've been through have been the most draining experiences of my life.

It's not going to be much longer. I hope when this is over you will get lots of rest and stay far away from anything resembling a hospital for a good long while. Believe me, it will do you a world of good.

Wishing your Dad a peaceful passage and healing vibes for you and your family.

They took out the Failure to Thrive provision. FTT provided hospice care to be for a term of 6 months. You could even graduate and then later be put back on for another 6 months as long as the care was just palliative--no feeding tubes, surgeries, antibiotics for pneumonia, etc.

My Mom was on hospice for 5 months ( at home) . Her heart was failing and she had mal-absorption. She was 87 and didn't want to go back to the hospital for surgeries, etc. She hardly ate anything. She had little sense of thirst, which is not uncommon when the body is preparing to die. She was awake and cheerful but to the eye, she was wasting away. One morning she informed me that she wanted nothing to eat or drink--just wanted to listen to her favorite music. She passed away that evening, peacefully. There was never any pressure for her to die faster--back in 2005.

Oh, at the same time that Failure to Thrive was taken away, the salaries of home health care nurses was cut. This was all during the wheeling and dealing of 2009 between Dems and Repubs.
These cuts were to be done in increments, so no one would notice, I guess.

So they have been sending many people home from hospice care because they can't figure out exactly the time they will die.

May he have a safe and peaceful passage.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

The last week was the hardest, by far.

Thank you all for the kind words and thoughts. 💖

my mom died this past February. It's so hard

I'm very sorry for your loss.

I wish you and your family all the strength and comfort at this stressful time.

I think the only thing worse than the actual loss of a family member is when you are waiting and just want it over. So many painful and conflicting emotions.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

From us to you and yours...

I am so sorry. I cannot imagine your loss

for your kind words.

My original post was written out of frustration; I hated that we didn't have any other recourse but to watch him struggle and die. I still think that we shouldn't prolong the death of our loved ones.

But having said that, the hospice team kept him pain free and comfortable until the end.

Thank you to everyone who posted prayers and kind wishes. Your words made it easier for me and I love appreciate you all.