His reply was "We don't sell it by the yard, we sell it by the foot". I don't think they teach equivalencies in math anymore.

"we don't have French mustard, we only have Dijon!'

Was buying some beer, saw this new beer from Scheiner, TX called Scheinerboch. Hmmm, I'll give it a try even though it's much more costly than the usual swill (Miller!) I drank back then. Took it the counter and asked the kid why it was so much more than the other beers (I knew why. It's better for one!) in the cooler.

"Because it's imported.", he said.

that's where the Spoetzle brewery is, they make a bock.

Yes, Shiner. Thank you.

but they make a hefeweizen that's not bad.

I'll stick with their boch on the rare occasion that I drink now a days.

might be one of my favorite meals on the planet.

I don't care for their lager but I'll go out of my way for their bock.

Waitress asks what do I want to drink?

I say iced tea.

She says we don't serve alcohol.

I say again iced tea. Same result.
I tried a couple more times. Same result.
She starting to get mad, now.

I say let me see your pen, and I write "iced tea" on my napkin, and hand it to her.

She laughed for ten minutes, and said...I thought you were saying Asti!

I have a southern accent.

...an ear re-check on a little boy I saw fairly frequently. When I picked up my otoscope, he pointed to his ears, and we started doing the "Where is your nose, mouth, tummy, etc" game. He was getting them all until I got to the eyes. He just looked at me. Tried a couple more times, and nothing.

His mom, who was from North Carolina, said, "Whaah Bradley, where are your aahhhs?" He got it right away.

It was intersting to me that my pronunciation of "eyes" was so different from his mom's that he did not understand what I said.

He bought a half-gallon of milk.

Cashier: Do you want that in a bag?

Customer: No, keep it in the carton.[hr]I know that bagged milk is a thing, and I suspect that that's what the customer was thinking, but the cashier definitely had no idea.

So our "youngsters" grew up with metres and litres etc. I once heard a guy give a young salesman in a timber shop a hard time because the young guy didn't know what a yard was.

I wonder if the older guy knew how long a rod is/was.