Seeking advice regarding my nephew.
Hey there.
So as some of you know, my brother in law passed away in a tragic car accident within the past year. This has, expectedly left his family in a transformative disarray. Without going into too much detail, I want to just focus on my nephew.
A lot of people in my family say that he and I are VERY MUCH ALIKE. We've even been mistaken for twins. It's crazy. He's 16 and I'm 29. But the growth spurt gave him height and he's got the same hair as me so there you go.
Those details are important because he finds me to be his most relatable relative. And that relatability has only gotten more solid by this death in the family because, my dad suddenly died of a heart attack when I was 17. Got that? His dad died when he (my nephew) was 16 and mine passed when I was 17.
But here's the important difference between how our lives played out after losing our fathers.
First, here's what happened to me.
I had many close friends and a social network in public school and even church youth group.
Immediately after my dad passed (he died when we were in the middle of a move) my mom and I moved in with my sister and her family. (My nephew's family yes)
I was rarely alone. I had male role models that involved me in things. My future step dad, my brother in law who was alive at the time, my high school counselor.
But here's what my nephew's got going on...
He's got no friends in real life. He's homeschooled. He's got no neighbors and he's isolated on several acres of land with trees and field. His only connection outside is the internet.
He's still in the house his mom and dad worked for. And his sister and Mom are dealing with their grief alone and without him. His mother is now, 9 months later starting to date another man. His sister who is twenty one and is already a grown woman is growing resentment for the mother and is therefore trying to move out on her own. All of this abandons my nephew, whom, is still homeschooled by a computer and fortunately, doesn't seem to notice this fracture.
And finally... I think his only male role models at this point are me and my stepdad.
Needless to say, he's been living a sheltered existence and I'm afraid of what this fracture in his family might do to him. I had a great social network following the death of my dad. He doesn't.
My wife and I want to have him come over more often and just give him a world outside of that isolation over there. It's just, we're not parents and we want to figure out a way get him out of his comfort zone and be more adept with the world.
Any advice is appreciated. Thanks for reading argh sorry about all that.
= new reply since forum marked as read
It's wonderful of you to take such interest in his well-being. There are tons of things you, your nephew, and step-dad can do together. Start with what he likes to do!
You might think he has no friends, but you can ask him to bring along a buddy. He might surprise you. Best wishes to your family. 
I agree he could use the support of peers and he could make friends. And I also agree that he's very fortunate to have you in his life...
