Hey, LuckyCharms! Isn't Krytonite your greatest weakness?

the Viagra doesn't work quickly enough.

Must be the the kryptonite, Lois.

In a job interview once I was asked by the two people interviewing me "what's the first thing you would do if we put you in charge tomorrow?" As a joke I said "I'd fire you two."

They didn't laugh. I didn't get the job.

Welcome to DU and the Lounge

and I'd be damn tempted to use a line like that. Perhaps your delivery was, ahem, too wooden.



Hope you enjoy the DU!

I gave him a brief overview of my responsibilities. He nodded, then said, "I would rather do your job. When do you think you will be leaving this place so I can have it?"

I did not hire him.

I give them a list of questions for which they need to have good answers, such as, what are your strengths, what are your weaknesses. Your answer should not have been dismissed like that, especially if you qualified it along the lines of--I'm working on being more diplomatic. Maybe this person had heard it too often.

But obviously, using the f-dash-dash-dash word was aiming for trouble!

it probably wasn't the F bomb that did me in. When I walked into the interview, as I shook his hand I said "Hey man, how's it hangin'".

And having a good time.

Snorf!

I'm usually not serious in here.

On the day of my interview I was suffering from a bad cold.

Almost as soon as I sat down with the Personnel woman,
I half sneezed, coughed, and blew a wad of snot out my noose
which dripped down my chin.

I'd not brought a hanky with me, and she had to search in her purse for a Kleenex.

It was a very short interview.
She thanked me for applying, and I never heard back from the company.

I guess I 'blew' it?

wiped that all over my sleeve real fast and then carried on as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened.

I'm not going to work until my boss takes back what he said to me.

What did your boss say to you?

You're fired!

The regional manager conducted the interview, She was a very attractive woman very revealingly dressed with a low cut blouse.

Now I'm a happily married man in his late 50s at the time, she was about 40-ish. She was wearing a diamond pendant with a single very large diamond that rested in her cleavage. I couldn't help but notice it and wondered if it was a real diamond because of it's size. The interview went well, I seemed to be answering the questions to her satisfaction.

When I left the room I was kicking myself for spending the entire time basically looking toward her boobs. I figured, well, I blew that one.

She called me the next day and hired me.

True story.

glaring at the interviewer and polishing their fingernails. You will get the job. Then you have to pay the tough guys off.

Wolf