that "fix" really never fixes anything, it just hides the pain

we are here for you

And yes, there are people who care, but, I miss my dog

I heard a neighbors' dog, baking away. I miss my dog.

My first was a boxer, Georgie. When she passed away I was inconsolable. I remember curling up on my bed and just sobbing I missed her so much. It took a long time to remember her and smile instead of crying, but eventually I could. I cherish every crazy moment I was lucky enough to have her in my life. I know it will be the same when Leo passes away, but at least I know time will allow me to come to a place of loving memories instead of sobbing.

I am so sorry you are going through this, please know I will be thinking of you and hurting for you.

sooooooo much it hurts. I can cry in a nanosecond , like I am doing now. It sucks!!! We were together, just the 2 of us, for over 17 years and she died sort of suddenly (10 days is suddenly after all that time). I would be drinking myself into a stupor if I thought I would feel better but I know it would be only a temporary band-aid and I would be even more depressed later (if that's possible). Don't do it, you'll feel worse.

Grieve not,
nor speak of me with tears,
but laugh and talk of me
as if I were beside you -

I loved you so -
'twas Heaven here with you

~Isla Paschal Richardson



I do know how hard it is; it's like they take a piece of our heart with them.

pet helps get over the loss of a loved previous pet.

1) Being sober won't cause your death. Drugs and/or alcohol very well might. Either through health effects, or due to the behavior that you wouldn't otherwise engage in.
2) Getting loaded is only a temporary reprieve from what's actually bothering you. It's a band-aid, at best. Nothing will be better than it was before you got loaded ... when you're no longer loaded. However, you're likely to feel even worse from the comedown/hangover. This very often leads to a vicious cycle type of effect.
3) Drugs and alcohol are a waste of money, you save a lot by not partying.
4) It's easier to keep a job if you're not using.
5) It's pretty hard to GET a job if you're using.
6) Your friends and family likely won't trust you if they know you're using. This hurts, and drives more use/drinking.
7) Using wastes time that could be better spent doing something that's ultimately more fulfilling.
8) If anything important suddenly comes up, you know you can deal with it ... get in your car and drive somewhere you're needed, for example ... if you're sober.
9) You can make plans for things occurring in the future and feel a semblance of certainty that you'll be able to follow through with those plans if you're sober. That is actually an underrated benefit IMHO.
10) You won't ever go to jail simply on account of being sober.

In a nutshell, there's nothing so bad that can't be made immeasurably worse ... by picking up.

Hows that for a start?

I got me some chops, yeah?

and liking the person your living with (sometimes just a little bit) more is easier
(scratch easier) -- is more realistic when you're sober.

sorry for the sh** night. but, you got this.

yes indeed

The normally nice people across the street are going to divorce or settle.
Several ppl were on the street
, yelling loudly enough to wake me.

Humans suck

That is why there are dogs...to counteract the humans we have to deal with.

Now when I hear my neighbor's dog bark and now I start crying right away since I miss it. I even canceled my own birthday plans for Fri, I don't feel like putting on a happy face since it takes too much energy to fake smile for even 15 seconds. I am glad I have to wear a mask if I go out, it hides my permanent frown. If you find that misery loves company, you can email me.

oddly enough I find that simple requests get better results

Sobriety is better because I don't feel the need to question it. It simply is. And in sobriety, life's benefits and tribulations are experienced and processed as the continual flow and ebb of an existence lived in relative serenity.

I say ‘relative serenity’ because the reality of sobriety is that there is no serenity in stasis. In sobriety, we recognize that all experiences are transitory. But rather than obsessing upon select moments and finding them intolerable, or just uncomfortable, and from there seeking escape through alcohol or drugs, we recognize that each moment is precisely what it is: A moment, a finite experience, and as such we know it will pass.

No longer do I wake in the moment, head racing uncontrollably, a terrible sense of calamity hovering above, wondering and wishing, hoping and praying that I might be flushed from the madness of drink. No, I wake today with expectations of the future and a heart of hope and love.

The Psalmist tells us, “Be still, and know.” That is the fruit of my sobriety. The strength to be still in myself, and the power to know who I am and, better yet, who I want to be.

Is it sucessful? Enough that I no longer question it. Is it permanent? By no measure. I do, however, accept that all shall pass, both the good and the bad, and that love will be left as the only thing permanent in my life.

So I’m left where I began, with your question: Is it better? Conside this: All my thoughts, all my wishes at the moment, are that you shall find peace within yourself. How many drunkards in their cups spend their moments thinking, and hoping, for the welfare of others? I find that a more than adequate tradeoff from the misery of my drinking.

Let me gift you with this, a thought my best friend gave me when our little Buddy passed:

"We are here to joyfully participate in the sorrows of the world." -- Joseph Campbell

Those of us that have lost our furry babies know your pain...it is real. Everything we are feeling right now is compunded by the horrible things going on in this country. I suffer from anxiety and cannot remember what it is like to have a decent night of sleep. Both of my children live in other states and we cannot travel to see them and our grandchildren...it has been months. We have to stay strong as difficult as things are right now. Sending you love, peace and hugs.❤✌😷