When Dogs Lose Their Friends
We moved "Grandma" in with us about 8 years ago. (A year or so after we moved out-of-state she became unable to drive without running into things). So it's been the three of us. She was 91, contracted the flu this week. Sick, but alert, walking, she had an apparent heart attack on the way to the dr's office yesterday. The ER was actually closer. They went to work quickly, but despite their efforts she died. My wife lost a buddy in her as well, and it rips deep into me to see her so sad, but we will work through that.
But I want to post about something else.
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She was adopted by one of our chihuahua/pomeranian rescues, abt 8 lbs, (we have two) and he rarely left her side or lap. We have 3 much bigger dogs (one a 130 lb Anatolian, who Adam thinks hung the moon), but Adam was Grandma’s dog, and she his human. He reminded everyone of that when necessary, did his 7” tall best to take care of her, and Grandma would run his thieving sister off when she tried to steal his food 
. When Grandma would leave (church, dr, etc), his world was visibly different. He would lie on her bed till until she returned.
Oh, the sheer joy upon the occasion of her return! The first and only thing he wanted, Hurdle up onto the table to see them drive in, yipping and jumping from sheer joy 'till she got in the door, which was deserving of more jumping up and down and barking, then onto her lap where he could greet her properly. They both just laughed... Treats appeared once in a while, but I suspect it was more than the food, which came not to matter after awhile.
We came home without her yesterday. Adam couldn't understand. We never come home without Grandma. He would take a little food, but then it was back to the door, jumping, waiting, and barking. I had to make arrangements with the crematorium, so I asked if it would be alright if I brought him. The woman said she would need to speak to the director, and we set up an appointment. We showed up, I left Adam in the car with my wife, still anxious, wiggly, yipping a little now and then. Maybe I was lucky, but we were met by the director, he let us in his office alone. He brought Grandma into a chapel in a paper box. I took Adam in and held him near her head and shoulders, and as he smelled, (I placed him near her face), he visibly relaxed, and his head lowered. He quit wiggling. I held him there a bit more, let him kinds of stand near her, spoke a bit, and said goodbye.
We left, and when we came home there was no more jumping and barking. He went in, walked around the room a bit, and jumped on her bed to lie down. That night he slept with us, and the big dogs had to learn to make a space again. Today he has gone in and out of Grandma's room, but no longer looks for her, and is sleeping with my wife.
I don't want to attribute human traits to a dog, and I think the world dogs see is created mostly by their noses. It doesn't look like the one we see, or at least not the way we think of it. But I think there is some kind of attachment there, and perhaps we gave him a little chance to understand his loss and deal with it.
If the occasion arises, perhaps you could see if there is a friend left behind that needs your help. I don’t know what that need might be, but I bet it will be appreciated.
= new reply since forum marked as read
And thank you for including us as well. 
just lovely.
who is 85 years old and currently sick in the hospital. Quique misses her every minute that she is away and wakes up in the middle of the night to mournfully howl for his missing mother. I have never seen a more emotional animal in my life and I have become more keenly aware of all mammals who feel the joys, pains and sorrows of living as we do. Our oneness with the world and all living things should guide us throughout our lives and motivate us to cherish our roles as stewards of the planet and our world. We should love and appreciate our furry friends and remember that their lives are as equally precious as ours. 
how precious their bond was.
Why do so many people think that because animals don't rationalize, that they don't have emotions? Of course they do!
My sympathies on your loss & special scratches for Adam.
I try to remember the joy but it's very hard when you think about how confused the dog must be.
My wife especially. She read through all the comments and appreciated them more than you can know. It's can be very hard to lose the one parent that raised you, the one you could count on to be there through all your life, as those of us who have been through this know. But at least I can try and figure out when it is getting overwhelming and make us take a break from it all.
Adam seems to be doing fine, and there is a lot of extra holding and hugging going on. Probably will be for awhile. And, of course, Evie (Chi/Pom), Lacey (Jindo mix), Charlie (English Setter), Shelby (Anatolian Shepherd) , and especially Boudreaux-Boudreaux, or "Buddy" (the Shar-pei terrier mix everyone thinks is a pit bull) all point out that cooked up turkey bacon should help her tremendously, especially when it is shared with them.
Btw, I have a messenger bag, olive drab, kinda plain, took all the books out and put Adam in there for the visit. In case anyone might have something similar in mind. Nice hiding place, especially if you hold a treat inside to keep them occupied while someone else clears the way.
Again, thank you.
