Famous Movies as Described by Republicans

1. The Hobbit

Socialist midgets steal the property of a Job Creator dragon.

2. Scrooge

A principled conservative businessman is terrorized by supernatural left-wing thugs into giving away his hard-earned money to welfare leeches.

3. Animal House

The tragic story of an idealistic young patriot, Douglas Niedermyer, tormented by lazy anarchists.

4. A Few Good Men

Sissy lawyers tear down a courageous Marine colonel for enforcing discipline among his troops.

5. The Shining

A strong father figure is forced to take drastic measures to control his whiny, ungrateful wife and disobedient son.

6. Roots

A poor African villager is adopted by a generous American family and taught the value of hard work.

7. Dr. Strangelove

Terrifying portrait of how America's military was hamstrung by peacenik civilians during the Cold War.

8. Se7en

The inspiring story of a devoutly religious man persecuted by police for attempting to live by Biblical principles.

9. All the President's Men

A disturbing look into the liberal media's conspiracy to bring down one of America's greatest Presidents.

10. Mississippi Burning

Heartwarming look at a Southern community's heroic stand against federal bullying.