And I think Abby was going off the assumption (based on the letter, not off base) that she does want to save the friendship. She is basically saying that the religious friend is not likely to change and thinks she's doing the right thing. The writer can speak up (gently if she wants to protect the friendship or friend's feelings) but in the end the writer will likely have to decide if the friend's actions make the relationship not worth the insults/aggravation.

Meanwhile, another excuse to post this.

For starters, I would definitely tell her that she was being disrespectful, which is exactly what she is doing. Ask her neighbor if she would appreciate it if she returned the disrespect and proselytized her atheism. I certainly wouldn't tell her to grit her teeth and tolerate it.

As for losing her friendship, what friendship? Since her neighbor continues to disrespect her despite her pleas, WTF? I realize no one wants to create enemies, but there comes a time when you have to stand up for your own identity. Is there a tactful way do deal with such fundamentalism? I'm not the guy to ask, but Abby was no help either.

But, since they are friends because their daughters became friends, I wouldn't want them in the middle of it.

I'd probably tell them let's talk about our daughters, not Jesus.

In the meantime, I expect I'd learn a lot more about their particular religion and then talk to them about it when the children were not around.

But that's just me. I find religions a fascinating topic. After a few conversations, they'd probably tell their friends they were going to ignore me and that would be that.

and telling her that God loves her too, it smacks of Xian privilege. Particulary unpleasant bit:

Shut up, atheist, and listen to the Christian who has freedom of expression.