not scattered. Check local services (Neptune?) for cremation costs.

If the body is to be 'displayed' (or even closed casket) I believe that embalming is required. Check state regs.

If the person dies and then will be cremated right away, embalming, casket etc are NOT required. My folks wanted this and it was about $1200 for each of them.

I can't speak for fees 'required' for a church but usually an honorarium is given the priest. $500? To whom? The funeral home? No.

Hope this helps.

ON EDIT: Read this, please. BUT... note at the bottom of this article that is is now permitted to have the cremains at the funeral mass or wake. http://www.ewtn.com/library/ANSWERS/CREMATE.htm

in another state, had his ashes present at what looked like a regular funeral mass to me.

Thank for your post!

I know there's often a waiting period based on the state, and the medical examiner/coroner/etc needs to approve. Here in Iowa they can cremate as soon as the family approves and the medical examiner approves. Up in Wisconsin in addition to the permit there's a 48 hour waiting period, in Illinois there's a 24 hour period in addition with the permit. In such cases where there's not a visitation they don't need to embalm, they'll hold the body in refrigerated storage until they can go ahead with the cremation.

My aunt passed last month. We had the traditional wake and funeral service with the rental casket - then had her cremated in the days following the funeral. In her case they used a sturdy combination urn that was partially made of the same material they use for burial vaults. They buried her above my grandparent's graves. My mom was surprised when the deacon told her that the church was OK with cremation. She had grown up being told it wasn't allowed and never learned otherwise. (I knew for years and remarked that the local Catholic cemeteries probably wouldn't have put columbines in if it still wasn't allowed).

The Neptune Society ( http://www.neptunesociety.com/ ) is an excellent resource, even if you don't use their services. That said, $7,000 is outrageously expensive for a direct cremation and church service, and I speak as someone whose family is in the business.

Then items the funeral home deserves to be fairly compensated for include: 1.) Removal of the body from the residence, hospital, nursing home, etc., including mileage, if the location is not 'local' (most funeral homes here consider anything within 25 miles to be 'local'), 2.) a fair charge for storing the remains (if necessary), because some states require a waiting period before cremation occurs, 3.) fair charges for preparing the necessary documents, obtaining signatures, etc., 4.) actual crematory charges and round-trip mileage, if not done on-site, 5.) removing a pacemaker, if applicable, 6.) the cost of an urn or other container and 7.) a fair charge for their services related to the church service.

Don't be afraid to shop around, and don't be afraid to bargain. Charges may vary widely, even within the same community. What you're wanting to do is what I did with my son, and the entire cost was $4,000, which included a nice urn.

Hope this helps.

Mine does, and its bare bones package is but a fraction of what a funeral home would charge.

Our society does not arrange for anything but the cremation, so any masses or memorials have to be taken care of by customers themselves. I can't imagine dealing with your mother's parish directly would result in a $500 fee for a funeral mass.

They do ask for a $200 donation for the Church (though I know they make exceptions). The $500 was for the funeral person to sit there -- unnecessary!

I did find a MUCH more reasonable place, and I talked to the Church and made sure it would all work.

Thanks!