Atheists & Agnostics

Heddi

(18,312 posts) Tue Mar 25, 2014, 07:47 PM Mar 2014

Hey Guys! What do you think of this explaination....Do you think that the BIg Bang was really

that God Died and when he died that's when the big bang happened? And why can't Atheists get behind it because that TOTES MAGOTES explains why God doesn't get involved in our day to day lives and try to prove me wrong because you can't and this is totally what happened.

Oh yah Hey Guys! How about this mind-blowing esoteric view of the universe: When it thunders, it's really God playing bowling in his celestial bowling alley. I mean it makes sense. It's a rumbling and it sounds like bowling and the lightening is him making a Strike because at my bowling alley it doesn't really lightening when you get a strike it makes an "X" on the TV with the scores but that could be God's way of indicating a Strike bceause maybe they don't have TV scoring in heaven. And go ahead and try to prove me wrong because you can't because I don't believe in commas.

Oh oh oh and what about this one too: That when I close my eyes the world turns black which means the rest of the world goes away and oh what if we're all just virtual reality and God is the 1st player and we're just in a big game of the Sims and that totally makes sense and it's something that Atheists can get behind because I"m an Atheist and the bible doesn't say anything about us being a computer simulation so why not?

Maybe we could start teaching this idea in school, this idea I have that GENESIS is just a WRITTEN DESCRIPTON of Evolution and the big bang, and that the Bible WRiters from 2000 years ago really understood cosmology more than they let on and and even though they thought leprosy was a plague for being evil, they TOTTTTEEEESSS MAGOOOTEEESS understood space-time continum and that when Genesis said 'lt there be light" it was really referring to the creation of the stars and when it talked about the firmament THAT MEANT THE EARTH and it totally makes sense in this beautiful way so I think that's something that Atheists could get behind because it's a completely nonsense theory that makes atheists look like boobs

PROVE ME WRONG

19 replies

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Highlight:

Hey Guys! What do you think of this explaination....Do you think that the BIg Bang was really (Original Post) Heddi Mar 2014 OP

I don't know about THE God, deucemagnet Mar 2014 #1

So what if GOd is really Dr Phil Heddi Mar 2014 #2

I'm not nearly stoned enough to have that conversation. n/t deucemagnet Mar 2014 #6

I don't think it's possible to be stoned enough to have that conversation Heddi Mar 2014 #8

You want the real story about the "big bang"? Let's put it this way: Warren DeMontague Mar 2014 #3

fraaap Heddi Mar 2014 #4

That is a new one on me Curmudgeoness Mar 2014 #5

The genesis of Dad jokes. n/t deucemagnet Mar 2014 #16

Verily I say unto thee... awoke_in_2003 Mar 2014 #19

I call bullshit. Curmudgeoness Mar 2014 #7

Go look in the R.F. Heddi Mar 2014 #9

I respectfully decline. Curmudgeoness Mar 2014 #10

I'm about to eat a baked potato and some roasted chicken Heddi Mar 2014 #11

Start here. Curmudgeoness Mar 2014 #13

I have this theory LostOne4Ever Mar 2014 #12

That's gettin' damn close to defacto7 Mar 2014 #14

They sound as likely as the nonsense in genesis. TxDemChem Mar 2014 #15

For some reason that poster was hostile to the suggestion to substitute Warren Stupidity Mar 2014 #17

I caused the Big Bang Act_of_Reparation Mar 2014 #18

deucemagnet

(4,549 posts)

1. I don't know about THE God,

Reply to Heddi (Original post)

Tue Mar 25, 2014, 08:06 PM

Mar 2014

but what if ONE God came to Earth and sacrificed himself so that all life on Earth could come into being? It makes perfect sense! It must be true!

Oh wait, no. It's the first scene from Prometheus. Sorry.

Heddi

(18,312 posts)

2. So what if GOd is really Dr Phil

Reply to deucemagnet (Reply #1)

Tue Mar 25, 2014, 08:06 PM

Mar 2014

? HOW ABOUT THEM APPLES

deucemagnet

(4,549 posts)

6. I'm not nearly stoned enough to have that conversation. n/t

Reply to Heddi (Reply #2)

Tue Mar 25, 2014, 08:17 PM

Mar 2014

Heddi

(18,312 posts)

8. I don't think it's possible to be stoned enough to have that conversation

Reply to deucemagnet (Reply #6)

Tue Mar 25, 2014, 08:20 PM

Mar 2014

I've been pretty stoned. I've never been that stoned. That's the level of Stonage that = comatose

Warren DeMontague

(80,708 posts)

3. You want the real story about the "big bang"? Let's put it this way:

Reply to Heddi (Original post)

Tue Mar 25, 2014, 08:06 PM

Mar 2014

Heddi

(18,312 posts)

4. fraaap

Reply to Warren DeMontague (Reply #3)

Tue Mar 25, 2014, 08:07 PM

Mar 2014

when I was little I was told that sulfery smell in the air was from the Paper Mill.

now I know it's God's butt

Curmudgeoness

(18,219 posts)

5. That is a new one on me

Reply to Warren DeMontague (Reply #3)

Tue Mar 25, 2014, 08:15 PM

Mar 2014

and I am hysterically laughing. My cat god thinks I'm crazy.

deucemagnet

(4,549 posts)

16. The genesis of Dad jokes. n/t

Reply to Warren DeMontague (Reply #3)

Wed Mar 26, 2014, 07:56 AM

Mar 2014

awoke_in_2003

(34,582 posts)

19. Verily I say unto thee...

Reply to deucemagnet (Reply #16)

Fri Mar 28, 2014, 01:38 AM

Mar 2014

Pull my finger.

Curmudgeoness

(18,219 posts)

7. I call bullshit.

Reply to Heddi (Original post)

Tue Mar 25, 2014, 08:20 PM

Mar 2014

I prove you wrong easily. How could God have spoken to Moses, and Noah, and hell, everyone in the Bible, but not us, if He was DEAD? You have to come up with a better one than this. Explain it. And what's more, how could He have sent his son to save our asses from our sins if He was DEAD?

On the other hand, if someone were to say that they thought that God died at the Big Bang, I might be interested in hearing about it. Few believers are willing to say that God is dead. That would be fun.

Heddi

(18,312 posts)

9. Go look in the R.F.

Reply to Curmudgeoness (Reply #7)

Tue Mar 25, 2014, 08:23 PM

Mar 2014

There's someone kind of saying that same thing. Then they go into the "Here, let me use multisyllabic words to prove my intellectual intellect to you, weakling" sprinkiled with a hefty dose of "oh yeah? You don't agree? PROVE ME WRONG?"

so tiresome. I really wish there'd be an age restriction here. 15 year olds flexing their debating skills is just...eh.. been there done that

Curmudgeoness

(18,219 posts)

10. I respectfully decline.

Reply to Heddi (Reply #9)

Tue Mar 25, 2014, 08:34 PM

Mar 2014

Although I was sure that your post had something to do with doings there, I just cannot stomach it. Right now, I am in a good mood, and I am not that interested in trite arguments over there. Maybe tomorrow I will check it out.

Heddi

(18,312 posts)

11. I'm about to eat a baked potato and some roasted chicken

Reply to Curmudgeoness (Reply #10)

Tue Mar 25, 2014, 08:38 PM

Mar 2014

It'l make my fingers greasy, which makes it hard to type, which makes my arguments come out all slippery. So I'm just gonna go look at cat pictures.

Curmudgeoness

(18,219 posts)

13. Start here.

Reply to Heddi (Reply #11)

Tue Mar 25, 2014, 09:08 PM

Mar 2014

LostOne4Ever

(9,290 posts)

12. I have this theory

Reply to Heddi (Original post)

Tue Mar 25, 2014, 08:52 PM

Mar 2014

God is a monkey chained to a keyboard and computer randomly pushing buttons.

As for that particular thread you are referencing....I have too big of a headache to deal with that atm.

defacto7

(13,485 posts)

14. That's gettin' damn close to

Reply to Heddi (Original post)

Wed Mar 26, 2014, 01:23 AM

Mar 2014

deism... plus a lot of extra cosmological bits and pieces. It must be the truth of truths.

TxDemChem

(1,918 posts)

15. They sound as likely as the nonsense in genesis.

Reply to Heddi (Original post)

Wed Mar 26, 2014, 06:46 AM

Mar 2014

I'm down for the FSM creation story. Lol they're all so creative!

Warren Stupidity

(48,181 posts)

17. For some reason that poster was hostile to the suggestion to substitute

Reply to Heddi (Original post)

Wed Mar 26, 2014, 08:13 AM

Mar 2014

"pokemon" for "god". I can't figure out why.

Act_of_Reparation

(9,116 posts)

18. I caused the Big Bang

Reply to Heddi (Original post)

Wed Mar 26, 2014, 11:08 AM

Mar 2014

when I snuck into the kitchen at 3:00 AM and tried to pull a tub of moose tracks ice cream out of a over-stuffed freezer without waking my wife. My mission was a failure.

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