They have much to do and the hour is late.

They must sabotage the career of an upwardly mobile young general named Macbeth.

They must lure an old wizard into a cave and lock him there so that Camelot may fall.

They must finish Ron and Harry’s homework for them (again).

They must turn some people into newts and let some of them get better and let others run for office and go on prime-time cable.

They must transform all of Odysseus’s sailors into swine and then back again, get Sabrina through high school, freeze Narnia permanently, complete all sorts of housework for Samantha Stevens.

They have a good many apples to poison and drug and mermaid voices to steal and little dogs to get, too.

And then they have an election to rig.

They must make haste. The vagenda is quite full.