http://jezebel.com/5952337/what-a-gross-facebook-page-tells-us-about-a-womans-need-to-be-desired

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The crux of the problem for this girl, let's call her Susie, is that she's stuck betweena rock and a hard place. On one side, there is the crushing pressure to be sexually desirable. She is aware of this pressure even before she caves to it, and at a much younger age than adults would like to believe. Why do you think we cake make-up on toddlers, sell push-up bras to 9-year-olds, or suggest that tweens get bikini waxes? We are preparing them for what we know is coming. They are smarter than we think and they know these tricks and tips are not for their benefit, but for the benefit of people who look at them.

On the other side, Susie knows that she loses the desirability game if she caves to the desires she has inspired. Though "sexual capital" isn't a phrase she will run across until her gender studies classes 10 years later, Susie intuitively understands that she loses hers if people think she's too accessible. I still remember the name of the girl who gave the first blowjob in middle school. Minutes after it happened, her name had worked itself from one end of the building to the other. You can bet that no one gave two shits who was onthe receiving end; he remained anonymous and she watched one afternoon's adolescent experiment destroy the desirability she'd spent years cultivating.

The wiggle room between the rock and the hard place-that sweet spot between being wanted and being respected-is all but non-existent. It is a sliver, a tiny wedge, the narrowest of alleys. Adult women spend years trying to find it, alternating between extremes, recalibrating, shooting for appreciation without denigration. Look at me,but not for too long. Want me, but don't try so hard. Think that I'm beautiful, but know that I'm classy. But not too classy. Lady in the street, freak in the bed. You know the drill.

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She learned that her body and her sexual choices, ill-advised as they might be, are up for public debate. She learned what grown women already know; by having a female body that you dare to parade around your neighborhood, you are asking to be looked at, lusted after, judged, discussed, desired, and sometimes touched. From this experience, Susie learned that when the rock and the hard place collide, it hurts like hell.