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eridani

(51,907 posts)
Sun Sep 27, 2015, 04:51 AM Sep 2015

Why Walking Down a Dark Alley at 2 A.M. Is Not ‘Asking For It’

http://inthesetimes.com/article/18430/rape-culture-and-the-corridors-of-fear

The most admirable part of Kate Harding’s Asking For It: The Alarming Rise of Rape Culture – And What We Can Do About It is how patiently it attempts to explain a problem that can feel nearly impossible to get across. As she notes, the very phrase “rape culture” tends to turn people off:

It sounds so extreme at first that I confess even I, a proud feminist, initially balked at the term. … Isn’t such overblown terminology the kind of thing that makes people call feminists “humorless” and “strident” and accuse us of holing up in our ivory towers, theorizing about human behavior without ever witnessing much of it?


It’s true that “rape culture”—the idea that we might live in a world that actually facilitates rape, particularly men raping women, so that the threat of rape can be used to keep all women in line—sounds flat-out dystopian at first.It’s also so embedded in the culture that it’s nearly impossible to spot: You don't notice rape culture, like you don't notice oxygen or gravity, in part because you've probably never gone without it. You could cite, as Harding does, the fact that convicted rapist Mike Tyson is now cast as a harmless kook in comedies like The Hangover and How I Met Your Mother; the fact that, in multiple movies and TV shows (Crank, Game of Thrones) rapes are presented as something the victim actually enjoys by the end; the accusations of “overreacting” and “militancy” aimed at those who believe Roman Polanski should serve prison time for raping a pre-teen, or that Julian Assange should be tried for date rape; the frequent mishandling of rape cases by the police, or the brutal attacks on women’s character when they bring those rape cases to trial; the climate of fear women live in, the constant messages that women should avoid doing certain things (wearing short skirts, drinking at parties, going to parties) unless they “expect” to be raped, and that they are somehow less worthy of compassion or justice if they “fail” to protect themselves.

Harding does spell all of this out, and does a great job of backing her case up with real incidents, some of which—like the story of a Philadelphia detective who referred to the sex-crimes unit as the “Lying Bitches Unit”—will turn your stomach. But she also dives into the most telling manifestations of rape culture: the moments when it becomes clear how the culture harms not just rape victims, but everyone. These are often apparently innocuous incidents. They’re the moments when you suddenly realize the gravitational force that's been holding you down.
14 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
Why Walking Down a Dark Alley at 2 A.M. Is Not ‘Asking For It’ (Original Post) eridani Sep 2015 OP
What a great article! gollygee Sep 2015 #1
I am surprised chervilant Sep 2015 #2
The review doesn't leave a lot of loose ends hanging eridani Sep 2015 #3
Spam deleted by MIR Team SteveCA Sep 2015 #4
Really, Steve? chervilant Sep 2015 #5
Message auto-removed Name removed Sep 2015 #10
Wow, how did we get the honor of your first post in this group? JTFrog Sep 2015 #6
Message auto-removed Name removed Sep 2015 #8
Why are you focusing on the actions of the victim? Evergreen Emerald Sep 2015 #7
Message auto-removed Name removed Sep 2015 #9
Kicking AuntPatsy Sep 2015 #11
I am so buying this book ismnotwasm Sep 2015 #12
K&R YoungDemCA Oct 2015 #13
Women who work at night have no choice but to walk alone in the dark. spooky3 Oct 2015 #14

chervilant

(8,267 posts)
2. I am surprised
Sun Sep 27, 2015, 08:25 AM
Sep 2015

that no one has posted a response to your OP. Thank you for this OP. I look forward to reading this book.

eridani

(51,907 posts)
3. The review doesn't leave a lot of loose ends hanging
Mon Sep 28, 2015, 04:07 AM
Sep 2015

That makes it harder for people to think of appropriate comments. I posted in order to get as many people to get the book as possible. It sounds like it will break new ground.

Response to eridani (Original post)

chervilant

(8,267 posts)
5. Really, Steve?
Mon Sep 28, 2015, 08:33 AM
Sep 2015

You might want to read the OP again.

I would also recommend Brownmiller's "Against our WILL" and any other book on rape that might help you understand.

Response to chervilant (Reply #5)

 

JTFrog

(14,274 posts)
6. Wow, how did we get the honor of your first post in this group?
Mon Sep 28, 2015, 09:45 AM
Sep 2015

Nice victim blaming.

I'd tell you to pay attention to where you are posting, but something tells me you know exactly where you are.

Can't wait for your next post.

Don't walk there... don't wear that... don't say that... don't drink that... don't DO that...

Why are all these activities considered risky to being with?

How about... DON'T RAPE people in alleys. How about a big old PSA about not being a rapist as opposed to all the things we are supposed to do or not do to keep someone else from being a rapist?

FFS.





Response to JTFrog (Reply #6)

Evergreen Emerald

(13,069 posts)
7. Why are you focusing on the actions of the victim?
Mon Sep 28, 2015, 09:46 AM
Sep 2015

What did she wear? How late was she out? Why didn't she park closer? Instead lets focus on the actions of the attacker.

Stop blaming the victim.

Response to Evergreen Emerald (Reply #7)

ismnotwasm

(41,980 posts)
12. I am so buying this book
Wed Sep 30, 2015, 12:38 PM
Sep 2015

I have "Transforming a Rape" culture-- and I always keep up on latest edition, a valuable book. This one sounds like a good reference as well.

spooky3

(34,452 posts)
14. Women who work at night have no choice but to walk alone in the dark.
Sun Oct 4, 2015, 05:11 PM
Oct 2015

No one seems to acknowledge this.

I frequently stop by the grocery on my way home from a weekly evening event. I chat with the cashier if she or he seems to want to talk with me. A question I often ask is whether s/he has been busy and often this leads to a statement such as "I'm nearly done with my shift - it ends at 11:30 (pm)." Cashiers at this store almost all take the metro, some to SE Washington DC, which includes some relatively rough parts of town. All who do have to walk alone several blocks to the metro station before boarding their train, unless someone else also happens to end his/her shift then, and then will need to walk alone from the departure station, to their homes.

I am sure none of them are working for fun at this store. They need the money and benefits. But they have no choice but to deal with the risks in getting to and from work.

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