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at a bad reaction to a dye study of her kidneys and went into arrest and then multiple organ failure and supposed brain death. The family was told and they said they needed 24 hours to think it over and the next morning she woke up. I bought a Christmas table decoration from her last month and she was sent up some friendly medical advice through my auntie today.

It was a rough road back but she didn't and doesn't yet want to die. So I reserve judgement for this family and whatever information they can get. A post yesterday said that information sharing is sometimes impossible for consultations with hospital software designed to efficiently bill insurance companies and secondarily for care givers and patients. You also have to wonder if this had been a blond blue eyed girl if opinions would be different. This was a tragic outcome to a surgery there is big money and careers at stake and that does enter into decisions which is why the family needs an outside impartial expert who can order their own tests even if necessary to make this decision.

At that exact same time in 2008 my mom was moved to palliative care for COPD of 15+ years. She had been hospitalized about once a year to reset medications but recovered and lived with my Dad and did pretty much everything she felt like doing. They told us she was no where near dying when they sent her to transitional care. She rallied for two days and then took a turn for the worse at noon on a frigid January day and passed away just after the last Grandchild's family got to the facility to say goodbye from half way across the country.

I think to give information is good. To ask questions is good but it does bother me people making black and white decisions on an anonymous message board that the family could some day run across. They deserve better, we should be better than that.

At my age I would not want to be in her position but I would have wanted the chance to come back to live my life if I was only 13. I do hope this family finds peace.