The DU Lounge

1. Deck of cards

2. Gun

3. Fishing pole with synthetic lures

4. Gallon jug of 1,1,1-Trichloroethane

Plan to get rescued:

Take the deck of cards and start playing Solitaire. When the helpful idiot points over your shoulder telling you which card to play ... you are saved.

Take the gun and shoot some wild animal out of season. When the Game Warden shows up to arrest you for hunting without a license ... you are saved.

Take the Fishing pole with synthetic lures and go fishing. When the Fish and Wildlife officer show up to arrest you for fishing without a license ... you are saved.

If all else fails, pour the Trichloroethane out on the ground. When the EPA shows up to arrest you for polluting the environment with hazardous chemicals ... you are saved!