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Jamastiene

(38,187 posts)
11. For me, it was mostly in clubs and bars here in town.
Thu Oct 11, 2012, 04:28 AM
Oct 2012

I used to play in bands a lot here in town. Before shows, we really didn't have dressing rooms, so we were out in the crowd. There was always some sweaty guy with a comb-over and a used-to-be-white undershirt that had turned yellow (and brown in some places too) who would hold his beer glass over his head yell, "Play some Skynyrd!" He'd spill beer everywhere and fall toward me and make some crude sexual comment, as if that would win me over even if I was a straight woman. It just gagged me. I thought about quitting music, at least in public, over it. I think my eventual decision to quit playing in bands was at least partly because of that.

The only time I ever really felt respected in a bar was when I went to a bar in upstate NY to see the producer of my band's demo's band play. Those guys were great and their fans were great. There were just as many women at the club as men and the men there respected women and you could tell it. Down here where I live, though? Pfft. I'd rather get a tooth pulled with no numbing agent than set foot in another bar here.

There have been other experiences outside bars and clubs too, but I did have trouble in the bars and clubs more just because I was in them back then so much. Nowadays, I hardly ever go to a bar unless it is a gay friendly or gay bar.

I can say that sometimes it has been just unwanted attention, period obamanut2012 Oct 2012 #1
I've had several really disgusting experiences out in public. Starry Messenger Oct 2012 #2
For me, it was mostly in clubs and bars here in town. Jamastiene Oct 2012 #11
:( Starry Messenger Oct 2012 #16
Other. rrneck Oct 2012 #3
Good use of the the Other option, thanks for the response inthread too. Starry Messenger Oct 2012 #9
I alerted on one post in that thread. FloridaJudy Oct 2012 #4
A few people in that thread GObamaGO Oct 2012 #5
Lots of posts in that thread make me glad none of those posters live near me. Starry Messenger Oct 2012 #17
This obamanut2012 Oct 2012 #19
That anecdote sounds like my own reaction to similar casual contact. Gormy Cuss Oct 2012 #6
I always just give a nod obamanut2012 Oct 2012 #7
I usually just get comments about the color of my hair, and the shape of my glasses. Neoma Oct 2012 #8
I walk around with earbuds in a lot, too obamanut2012 Oct 2012 #12
Ear buds get on my nerves. Neoma Oct 2012 #14
A ridiculous amount of times. Jamastiene Oct 2012 #10
This message was self-deleted by its author LaurenG Oct 2012 #13
Yes it used to happen all the time and it scared me a lot. LaurenG Oct 2012 #15
I was late getting a driver's license. Starry Messenger Oct 2012 #18
Other: There must be something wrong with me Catherina Oct 2012 #20
Shouldn't you be allowed to vote twice in this one? Iris Oct 2012 #21
I included "Other" to try to cover different situations. Starry Messenger Oct 2012 #22
Both. stevenleser Oct 2012 #23
When I was younger definitely - the whistling and propositions TBF Oct 2012 #24
I'm enjoying growing older too. Starry Messenger Oct 2012 #25
81% of women have experienced sexual harassment? Batman bin Suparman Oct 2012 #26
Thank you MIRT. Starry Messenger Oct 2012 #27
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